Drunken assault? Oh, Lindsay …

So by now you’ve probably heard about how The Betty Ford Clinic gave Lindsay Lohan an inch of freedom and how she in turn took a mile of vodka shots. Well, it gets better: Turns out Lindsay may have physically assaulted one of the staff members at Betty Ford after her night of debauchery. That’s our Lindsay! [Cue Laugh Track]

The Palm Desert Police Department is now investigating an altercation that occurred after Lindsay and her roommates reportedly went to a bar and came back home. Upon arriving at the house, the incident with a female staffer from Betty Ford allegedly went down. The police received a call at 1:03 AM on December 12 for “hand-to-hand battery.” Cops came to Betty Ford after receiving the call and interviewed both the staffer and Lindsay. We’re told the staffer “desired prosecution.” SOURCE

You have to hand it to Lindsay: No one can blow a massive opportunity like she can! Seriously, between Lindsay and Demi Lovato, I’m starting to believe that snitch-punching is the first lesson in the Mouseketeer handbook.

Mickey: Ha ha! Now remember kids, what do we do with punk-ass snitches?

The Mouseketeers: We smack them bitches!

Mickey: Ha ha! That’s right! Anybody gotta bump? Mickey’s starting to come down!

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.