Speidi is going to Abu Dhabi. Keep them!

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt

So the two-headed beast of fail and whoredom known as Speidi is apparently planning a vacation to Abu Dhabi to see an MMA tournament. Wait, what the hell ever happened to “Oh, we’re bankrupt now, feel sorry for us!” Are you telling me that the one shining moment of their existence was all for not? Fucking hell, people. Where the hell is the karma needed to bitchslap a couple of dipshit nobodies when you really need it?

Spencer tells TMZ, their bad ass friend — MMA fighter “King” Kevin Casey — will be throwing down at the Abu Dhabi Martial Arts Tournament on April 14 … and they’ll be ringside cheering him on. Spencer adds, “Heidi and I are both so excited to visit the Middle East and even more thrilled to watch King Kevin Casey smash his opponents.” SOURCE

All right, a couple ideas here:

#1: Follow them to Abu Dhabi, destroy their passports, make sure they never come back.

#2: Plant enough illegal substances on them that the TSA throws them in jail forever.

#3: Drop a piano on them.

#4: Convince them to enter the tournament; Film results.

Feel free to chip in here, people.

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.