Kanye West’s proposal to Kim Kardashian was filmed

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian

You’d figure Kim Kardashian would have learned something about not selling out for her love life after her last marriage crashed and burned in a fiery ball of famewhore destruction. But you’d be wrong. Very, very wrong. Because TMZ reports that Kanye West‘s marriage proposal was all filmed by a gawddamn legion of cameras so that they could sell their love life to E! Seriously, it’s the basis of their family motto: “MONEY! CHILDREN IN DAMNED BLOOD! SKREEEEEEEEEEE!” (It’s a rough translation from R’lyehian to English, but you get the point.)

She says no one got wind of Kanye’s plan until 2 days before the event. A contractor reached out to a bunch of musicians in the area. But here’s the thing, the orchestra members kept the secret for a full 2 days. They did sign non-disclosure agreements, but you know how that works. The woman also tells us multiple cameras were rolling during Kanye’s proposal, so there’s plenty of material for the Kardashian reality show. We’re told Kanye has final approval over whether it goes on the show or not. As for the event, she says Kanye was “very hands on.”

Granted, last time Kim put together a big fake sham marriage for money and attention, I said that she’d invariably end up divorcing the poor sap she duped into loving her and turn the ensuing divorce into its own little show, and guess what? I was right. So I’m going to call this one again and say that we can all look forward to the following primetime specials, coming to E! in 2014:

  • Kim and Kanye’s Fairytale Engagement
  • Kim and Kanye’s Magical Pre-Nup Argument
  • Kim and Kanye’s Wonderful Contractually-Obligated Wedding (sponsored by K-Mart!)
  • Kanye’s Slow Realization That He Entered A Loveless Marriage To A Shambling Plastic Surgery Monster For Monetary Gain
  • Kanye’s Fantasy Escape In The Middle Of The Night
  • Kanye’s Mysterious Disappearance That No One Is Allowed To Ask About
About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.