Kim Kardashian’s sex tape costs $30 Million!

Kim Kardashian

Good news, “mysterious stranger” (aka Kim Kardashian) who’s looking to buy the rights to Kim’s sex tape! It turns out, Vivid‘s head honcho Steve Hirsch is willing to part with the rights to the sex tape. Well, sorta. According to TMZ, the mystery buyer (KIM KARDASHIAN) needs about $30 million just to get his/her (oh who are we kidding, her) foot in the door.

We spoke with Vivid Entertainment top banana Steve Hirsch … who tells us he HAS made contact with the lawyer who’s representing the mystery party interested in buying the rights to the sex tape … and he’s open to the possibility of a deal. Hirsch tells us … “Based on its long term value, it looks like $30 million would be a starting point for a discussion on all of the rights.” Hirsch adds, “I have no idea who is behind this offer … but If it’s Kim, I have a tremendous amount of respect for her. She has my number and can call me any time.”

Steve, I’m asking you as nicely as I possibly can here: DO NOT SELL IT. I don’t actually want to see the Kim Kardashian sex tape, mostly because (A) I like the cock, and (B) Kim looks like one half of a donkey show. Specifically, the donkey. But Kim figured she could just skip the whole “paying your dues” thing and just jump straight to stardom by filming someone peeing on her. So no, keep that shit going on FOREVER. She wants to be on TV so bad? Then let’s keep circulating that sex tape, because without it, she’d just be another no-talent skank with a trust fund.

Kim Kardashian

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.