What, did you think Kim Kardashian using child labor to peddle her shoddy, ugly merchandise would be the worst story about Kim today? HA! Bitch please. It gets even worse! So after a story ran in the National Enquirer about how Kim did eff-all in Haiti, other than stay in the lap of luxury during the trip while avoiding those icky things like “work” and “the less fortunate people”, Kim has gone on the offensive, claiming that she actually just did next to nothing. See? World of difference. People magazine reports:
“Our mission was to learn more about [actress Maria Bello’s] charity, We Advance, meet the Haitian people who have made such amazing progress since the devastating earthquake in 2010, and celebrate the women of Haiti, who inspired me more than I ever could have anticipated,” Kardashian wrote. When Kardashian returned, she says she saw “malicious” reports that say she “spent a fortune” on herself in Haiti. “While my experience was completely life-changing … a very emotional and surprisingly positive journey that I will never forget, some media outlets have tried to tarnish the motive behind my visit and have written completely ridiculous and untrue things,” she wrote. “The truth is that I was at the Haitian Artisan Fair, where the amazing men and women who make their jewelry and crafts sell them to visitors to make a living, and I bought some beautiful jewelry!”
Gosh, what a trooper. Standing around doing nothing while people take pictures of you while you try and bullshit people into believing you’re promoting awareness? Good for you. I’m aware of a lot of shit, but that doesn’t make anything better. Although knowing Kim, she probably didn’t even do what she said she did because (A) she’s Kim Kardashian: doer of nothing, and (B) no, seriously: It’s Kim Kardashian. If you believe she’s either telling the truth or capable of actually doing anything to benefit others, then you are Aquaman now. You can breathe underwater and sharks want to give you hugs!
