Kim Kardashian is hear to assault your ear-holes!

Kim Kardashian - Jam (Turn It Up)

This is the sort of shit I put myself through for you people: I just listened to Kim Kardashian‘s first ever single Jam (Turn It Up). And now I’m writing about it. Are you happy now? Are you satisfied? Yesterday, I had to burn my English degree for warmth. I just … gah. I will punch Kim in the clitoris for this.

Kim Kardashian joined us in studio with sister Kourtney Kardashian to premiere her single Jam (Turn It Up) Wednesday morning on On Air with Ryan Seacrest as well as dish about current boyfriend and Nets player, Kris Humphries. Kim explains how she got the opportunity to work with The-Dream as “my good friend Ciara was like ‘The-Dream wants your number’ and i was like ‘Please, I’m sure he does’ and she said ‘no seriously he really wants to do a song with you’.” Adding, “[The-Dream said] let’s just have fun. Let’s donate the proceeds, let’s just have fun with it don’t take yourself seriously, try something you’ve never done before.” SOURCE

To be honest with you, I’m not even sure this is Kim. Actually, it kinda reminds me of that time Paris Hilton tried to sing. Remember what a total piece of shit that album was? (Yet girlfriend is still insisting on releasing another album soon) Well, imagine Paris’ passionless, bored delivery, only lay on more auto-tune. And some pee. At this point, you can pretty much assume that everything associated with Kim contains trace amounts of urine. Like bottled water.

Kim Kardashian - Jam (Turn It Up)

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.