Hey guys! It’s Jeremy Feist here, the new writer for Popbytes. I’ll just be here writing a couple extra posts throughout the day, so feel free to leave some love.
Anyway, onto the snark: Lindsay Lohan‘s SCRAM bracelet finally went off to the surprise of absolutely no one with a functioning brain, but good news! She managed to post bail, which means she won’t be doing any jail time, and her lawyer said the SCRAM bracelet only indicated a small amount of alcohol. Ummm, right.
In a statement Tuesday, Lindsay Lohan’s lawyer said the actress’ SCRAM device indicated the “presence of a small amount of alcohol” Sunday night.
“Having just received the report, I am not in a position to speak to its accuracy or validity, however Ms. Lohan maintains that she has been in complete compliance with all of the terms of her probation and her bail,” attorney Shawn Chapman Holley said in the statement. SOURCE
Considering that Lindsay Lohan’s blood technically counts as Sangria at this point, you kinda have to wonder what’s considered “A small amount of alcohol” for the girl. Right now I’m picturing something along the lines of Lindsay with a firehose of tequila hooked up to her mouth while she hauls around an IV drip full of vodka. Even then, she’d probably be walking around like, “Please, you call this a shot? Here, take this Super Soaker full of Jack Daniels and fire it directly into my eye.”
PHOTO | FAME PICTURES