Lindsay Lohan is un-freaking-touchable!

Lindsay Lohan

I hate to say I told you so, but let’s face it, I (as well as every other gossip blogger out there) have pretty much called it on the whole “Lindsay Lohan isn’t going to jail at all” thing, because now the jewelry store Lindsay supposedly stole from is torpedoing the case against her by trying to cash in on the surveillance tape!

The jewelry store — Kamofie & Co. — has been working with a broker for the last few days and the broker has been on the horn with numerous media outlets, salivating at the prospect of cashing in. The video has been sold — but it’s causing fits for the lawyers in the case, particularly the prosecutor. Lindsay’s defense is that the necklace was a loan … the jeweler begged to differ. So intent is critical, and if the jeweler is called to the stand and admits this was just a convenient way of scoring some quick cash from the media, Kamofie will have about as much credibility as (insert favorite celebrity who lied in “comment” section). SOURCE

Jesus tap-dancing Christ, is LiLo made of Teflon or something? Absolutely nothing will goddamn stick to this woman. Did she give a handjob to Satan or something? She just made the California legal system her bitch. AGAIN.

Judge: Well Ms. Lohan, it seems our case against you has been rendered moot … Hey, did you strangle another one of my bailiffs to death?
Lindsay: I was in Mean Girls once.
Judge: Good point, you’re free to go.

Lindsay Lohan

About JEREMY FEIST 4970 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.