Charlie Sheen’s Whore-a-Thon: The Movie!

Charlie Sheen

Show of hands: Anybody out there want to watch a porn consisting of two minutes of sex and fifty-eight minutes of cocaine-eating and promising to buy a pornstar a Bentley? Well your oddly specific wish is about to be granted, because Charlie Sheen may or may not (Oh who are we kidding, HE DOES) have a sex tape.

“Charlie and I were having this great project and he was talking about performing in front of the camera,” Felony said. He even made a demo: “Charlie’s got the tape. I gave it to him afterwards,” the madam said. “He was keeping it so he could practice.” If it does air, it could be pretty explosive: “The ladies love Charlie. He likes to explore his sexuality. He likes fetish, spanking, role play, really kinky stuff,” she added. SOURCE

Thankfully PopBytes has obtained a transcript of the video, which we’ve posted below:

Charlie: Oh yeah … Oh yeah … Oh yeah … Aaaaaand I’m finished. Who wants a Bentley?


Charlie: Alright, we’ll head to the dealership, just as soon as I grab a bite to eat. *Devours a suitcase full of cocaine*

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.