DJ AfroJack dumped Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton and DJ AfroJack

After six months in what I can only assume was cohabitational quarantine by the CDC, DJ AfroJack has finally had enough of Paris Hilton and decided to dump her heiress ass, I’m guessing because he woke up one morning, said “I’m dating Paris Hilton”, and then spent the rest of the day trying to wrestle a gun out of his mouth. RadarOnline reports:

Paris Hilton and DJ AfroJack have called it quits after dating for around six months, RadarOnline is exclusively reporting. “Afrojack had moved into Paris’ Beverly Hills mansion earlier this year, and the two got very serious, very fast,” a source close to the former couple tells RadarOnline. “Paris was really into him and admires the work he has done. Afrojack did a lot of the work on Paris’ new album which will be released later this year. He took a lot of criticism for working with her, but he truly does believe that she has talent. Paris was smitten with him, but Afrojack just wanted to have fun and not be exclusive with anyone. He is on the road practically every day performing in clubs all over the world, and he just isn’t ready to settle down, whereas Paris is.”

First off, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Second, I’m pretty sure nothing will destroy every last shred of your credibility as a musician and DJ faster than saying “I believe Paris Hilton has talent”. Seriously, you could show up to the studio one day wearing a tin-foil hat because you believe B-flat notes plant scorpions in your brain, and you would still be taken more seriously than someone who can listen to Paris’ bored, walrus gargling and call it “music”.

Paris Hilton and DJ AfroJack

About JEREMY FEIST 4832 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.