Justin Bieber is probably not the father!

Justin Bieber

Remember when the story about Justin Bieber allegedly knocking up some random groupie girl came out and I said it was probably just really bad fan fiction from a girl who was seriously hard-up for a hot dickin’? Well I was right. According to TMZ, Mariah Yeater actually tried the whole “Your my baby’s daddy!” gambit on some other poor sap before she tried Bieber, until she realized that she could always find an even bigger hill full of more gold for her to dig.

TMZ spoke with Frances Lippe … who tells us Mariah Yeater had been dating her grandson John Terranova in Las Vegas toward the end of high school. Lippe says Yeater came to their home in December 2010 and told Terranova she was pregnant with his child. He insisted he did not get her pregnant. The two got into an argument and police were called … because Yeater allegedly broke a car window out of rage. Later that day, according to the police report, Yeater returned to the home to work out a payment plan for the window … and got into another altercation with Terranova … and allegedly slapped John three separate times in the face with her open right hand. Yeater was arrested and charged for battery. A court date has been set in Vegas.

Another tale of backwoods white trash getting knocked up in their teens and then beating each other up? No way! It’s almost as if not teaching trashy skanks about birth control or appropriate life goals just leads them to ruin their lives with kids before they can even make it into college! Although I guess the Bieber thing was a fresh twist. Turns out, MTV’s Teen Mom would have been much more watchable and somehow just a teensy bit sadder if it featured Bieber.

Justin Bieber

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.