Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are done!

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel

Huh, what do you know, celebrity break-ups really are the new black. Called it! Anyway, Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel have broke up after something like three and a half years, presumably because Justin Timberlake can’t stop putting his penis in things and places it doesn’t belong. “No Justin, the vacuum is not where your penis goes.” “Awwwwwwwwwwwww…

Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake have broken up, TMZ reports, citing a source close to the former couple. The break was mutual, the site reports, and they remain on good terms. Biel and Timberlake have dated since 2007, though it’s been a rocky relationship at times. In late 2010, it was rumored that Timberlake had cheated with Olivia Munn; his rep soon denied it, but in January Life & Style reported that Timberlake told Munn, via text message, that his relationship “was over.” SOURCE

Wow, I bet Justin was totally caught off guard by all of this, especially since he thought they had already broken up.

Jessica: Justin, I think we should break up.
Justin: Wait, have I been sticking my penis in you?
Jessica: We’re having sex right now.
Justin: Ha ha, you’re so silly, girl who isn’t Olivia Munn.

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.