Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are reuniting?

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

Someone over at E! must have realized that a reunion special would bring in way more ratings than a divorce one, especially since Kim Kardashian has for some reason decided that now would be the appropriate time to stop letting cameras capture every boring, uninteresting, unfunny moment of her stupid life. So of course Kim was just shipped off to Minnesota to visit Kris Humphries and the minister who fake married them so that she could try and reconcile their reality television show. I mean marriage. The fake one they had for publicity and lots of money. TMZ reports:

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries threw a Hail Mary Sunday … to see if they could save their marriage — and after a four-hour meeting with their pastor, sources close to the couple tell TMZ a reconciliation is “up in the air.” According to our sources, the meeting with Pastor Joel Johnson went well as they talked through lots of issues. We’re told the two expressed respect and love for each other … but both acknowledged a lot is wrong with their relationship. Our sources say Kris was “ecstatic” Kim made the trip to Minnesota and he truly thinks he can win her back. As for Kim …. she’s unsure if she even wants to give it another go … but for now, she’s willing to keep talking.

No. NO. Stay divorced goddammit. I’m not sure you realize this, but if the only reason you can think to stay married is “Well, more people will watch my show!” then guess what? You do not deserve to stay married. You have completely failed at marriage, and in all likelihood, you also failed at life. Although if you really want to fix this marriage, here’s a quick little idea: First, find the biggest bag of shit you can find. Then choke on it. Marriage fixed!

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.