So Lindsay Lohan’s a diamond thief now. Of course!

Lindsay Lohan

Old Lindsay: Drugs and Booze. New Lindsay: STEALING DIAMONDS! Apparently, Lindsay Lohan is wanted by police after a $2,500 necklace was stolen from a shop in L.A. and surveillance showed Lindsay wearing it. Of course, that could just be a big misunder – Oh, wait, she then returned the necklace to the police, and she’s still on probation. Fuck.

Lindsay Lohan has just turned a super-expensive piece of jewelry over to cops that landed her in the middle of a police investigation … law enforcement sources tell TMZ. Law enforcement sources tell TMZ … last week the owner of an L.A. store filed a police report, claiming a $2,500 necklace was stolen from her business. We’re told the store surveillance video shows Lindsay in the store, wearing the necklace before it disappeared, although it’s unclear if the video actually shows Lindsay walking out of the store with the jewelry. SOURCE

I’m not about to run out and say that LiLo is some sort of master catburglar, because clearly, she’s not. Honestly, at this point we’ve already ruled out mental health issues and dependency, and I don’t think she did this because she’s a bad person, which ultimately leads me to one conclusion: Lindsay is fucking stupid. Dumb as shit. Bitch fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. And then the tree fell on her.

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.