The Kardashians might be part of the Illuminati?

Kardashian Kristmas Kard

Kardashian Kristmas Kard

So if I understand the conspiracy nutjobs behind the Illuminati, apparently there’s a conglomerate of celebrities and various other rich people who plan on taking over the world by doing … something, and their logo is a one-eyed pyramid, which they keep a secret by plastering it in the media. What a foolproof plan it is. So cunning, it could only be cracked by a bunch of barely literate teenagers on Twitter. Anyway, I don’t buy it for a second because these things tend to be full of sh!t (see: 2012, literally every other conspiracy theory that has ever existed) but apparently, photographer David LaChapelle decided to use that stupid one-eyed pyramid thing in the Kardashian Kristmas Kard and now everyone’s freaking out about it, including RadarOnline

In their latest eyebrow-raising gesture, the first family of reality TV veered off the beaten path for their annual Christmas card, (inadvertently?) injecting subtle imagery tied to the Illuminati, the oft-buzzed about, 18th century secret society jostling for world domination. In the card, shot by renown photographer David LaChapelle, a pair of pyramids, each with an eye on its’ top — iconography associated with the Illuminati — lurk in the background. Kim last month took to Twitter to deny any affiliation to the group. “What is the illuminate? A religion?…I’m a Christian,” she wrote. “A cult?…not into that sorry!”

Look, I get it: Conspiracies and Easter eggs hidden in the details are fun. That’s one of the big reasons why I love Gravity Falls so much: Because there actually IS narrative hidden underneath the veneer. That being said, that’s a TV show. This is reality. Humans are naturally conditioned to look for patterns even where there are none because it keeps them from going crazy, but let’s try and be logical about this. Is it really more likely that the Kardashians are secretly geniuses, or that they’re a bunch of stupid greedy famewhores who used conspiracy symbols in order to bait theorists and garner some easy attention? This shouldn’t be too hard to figure out, really.

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.