Anderson Cooper vs. Snooki!

Anderson Cooper and Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi

How’s this for depressing: it’s officially gotten to the point where Anderson Cooper has to take time out of his show to tell the world to stop paying Nicole ‘Snooki’ Polizzi to be a drunken whore. Depressing. Anyway, on 360 with Anderson Cooper, everyone’s favorite muscle-bound silverfox discussed the scandal over Snooki being a higher paid college speaker than author Toni Morrison, despite the fact that one is a respected writer and the other would fuck a pickle if given half a chance and some Valtrex. Seriously, try it. “OH. MY GOD. Is that a pickle? Oh yeah, I’m gonna make you feel real good … wait, a whole jar?! My prayers to the Vlasic Pickle stork came true! Woo woo! All aboard the pickle train! Next stop: My orange vagina!”

Anderson Cooper and Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.