Kim Kardashian needs Google Alerts about herself!

Kim Kardashian

Hope you enjoy this post guys, because it turns out someone on Kim Kardashian‘s team – or better yet, maybe even Kim herself – squee – might be reading this! While Kim leaving a salon in Santa Monica, a paparazzo snapped a shot of Kim and her phone, which showed that Kim was reading a Google Alert about herself. Which means there is a slight chance she’s reading this right now, in which case, yes, those pants make your fake ass look fat, and all of your shows are awful. Gawker reports:

Photographed exiting a beauty salon in Santa Monica, Kim Kardashian inadvertently revealed that she not only receives Google Alert emails whenever “Kim Kardashian” appears on the internet, but she actually spends her free time reading her personalized “Kim Kardashian” news alerts. This is remarkable for three reasons:

1 Kim Kardashian gets a lot of press. How can she possibly stand getting Google Alert emails every time anyone on the internet utters her name?

2 Kim Kardashian is on the record feigning surprise at celebrities who get Google Alerts. In this xoJane interview, Kim ridicules sister Kourtney’s Google Alert addiction:

Kourtney: I just got a Google alert, because Scott and I just had our date night.
Kim: You have your own Google alerts? We have that on record: Kourtney has her own Google alerts and checks them.

That’s from the interview where Kourtney erroneously claimed that Scott Disick’s dick is “like an elephant’s trunk.”

3 Since she gets Google Alerts and appears to read them, there is actually a chance that any random post that anyone writes about Kim Kardashian could end up on the screen of her Blackberry at some point.

Yay! It’s nice to know the horrible things I say about people who contribute nothing to society while expecting everything from it are possibly reaching them. It’s like when you find a roach in your fries and you write the manager asking them to get rid of the roaches. Only in this scenario, she’ll probably have one of her handlers roll her eyes for her because she can’t convey emotion and then call me a “hater” or some bullshit term that teenagers use to describe people who don’t fawn over their every move.

Kim Kardashian

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.