Heaven Help Us: Snooki is pregnant!

Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi

Remember how earlier in the month, Nicole ‘Snooki’ Polizzi was rumored to be preggers, which everyone just sort of wrote off as Snooki eating way too many pickles and walking around with a food baby? Well, turns out she might have been pregnant all along, and she was just hiding it so that she could score a sweet cover story (and paycheck) from Us Weekly. Page Six reports:

Sources said the reality star, who denied being preggers earlier this month, has already brokered a deal to announce the news on the cover of Us Weekly after she shopped the story to several celebrity magazines.

But sources tell Page Six that MTV is worried about how to manage the news, given that Polizzi’s hard-partying, booze-swilling ways have just been turned into a Jersey Shore spinoff with Jenni ‘JWoww’ Farley, which has begun shooting in New Jersey.

“MTV went into crisis mode after they found out,” said a source. “They’re trying to hide it because it would greatly affect the creative direction of the show. ” The untitled new show has just begun taping and focuses on the ladies’ relationship as friends and roommates — and whatever adventures come their way.

Oh you know MTV is freaking the shit out over this.

MTV Exec #1: Well … we’re up shit’s creek. How are we supposed to create a pregnancy show without teenage, redneck whores?
MTV Exec #2: Don’t worry, I think this will take care of itself.
MTV Exec #1: How so?
MTV Exec #1: Oh good God …

Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.